Setting the Record Straight on Loneliness

Let us not forget that it’s absolutely alright to be lonely.

To be lonely does not mean that anything is wrong with you.

To be lonely does not mean that you’re less spiritually developed than those who fill your feed with inspiration.

Loneliness is not lower on the totem pole of character qualities, than is any other quality of being.

To be lonely does not mean that you’re broken, damaged, or fucked up…nor does it diminish you or who you can be.

I’ve noticed a theme over the years; the shaming of loneliness.

Maybe not directly, but definitely indirectly and in a passive way.

As a daily meditator, this is a subject that I’m in deep contemplation and exploration of. Yesterday I asked my friends how they relate to their aloneness.

Thick as a stick of butter, I could feel the collective unconscious shame—and the unconscious need to distinguish between loneliness and aloneness.

For years I’ve felt this collective unconscious shame, for when the subject of aloneness is broached, loneliness inevitably comes into the dialogue.

What do loneliness and aloneness have to do with one another?

What is the entanglement between these two qualities?

Why must we speak to what we’re not in order to lay claim to what we are?

Why must we, as a culture, draw a line in the sand and make it clear that we are not lonely?

Why must we explain ourselves? …and fill the space with filler?

Whether explaining why we’re not lonely? Or whether qualifying the quality and nature of our aloneness?

What would happen to your sense of self, if I misunderstood you to be lonely when what you were intending was for me to understand that you are alone?

Why is it that our culture is so rejecting—and fundamentally fearful—of loneliness?

Here’s a fact.

I am lonely.

Sometimes.

Nor am I afraid of what this may make anyone think about me, for those are your projections, but what I do with them is mine.

I too am alone—and I once feared to be alone, as much as I feared to be lonely. I could be neither, and as a consequence, I suffered.

I too am accompanied. Sometimes.

Other times, I am alone, lonely, and accompanied all at the same time.

The truth is, to be lonely is neither good nor bad, right or wrong, better or worse than being alone (or accompanied).

All of these qualities are qualities of the Divine—and as a spark of the Divine, we too are these qualities, when we finally allow ourselves to be.

To truly be in the experience of our fundamental aloneness, we must integrate the shadow of our loneliness.

Until we embrace our loneliness, we cannot know true aloneness.

For as long as we reject and shame our loneliness, the aloneness we think we know is but a concept.

And that conceptual experience of aloneness, can not help but be caged by the bars of the loneliness we think we’re not.

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I invite you in the comments below to boldly claim and declare your loneliness...and notice what is happening in your body right now…notice what’s happening in your body as you’re typing your comment. Notice what happens right before you hit enter and of course, after you hit enter. Notice, notice, notice!

Take back your power by taking back your loneliness.

May this liberate the souls of the suffering.

#intimacyisthenewcurrency #iamlonely

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You can see the original Facebook post here.