Memorial day weekend of 2015 I packed up my tiny bright blue Mini Cooper with the belongings I thought I would need for a few summer weeks up north.
A couple of t-shirts, shorts, a pair of jeans, a nice button down, toiletries, yoga mat, foam roller, slack line, my native american flute and a bunch of other odds and ends.
I drove 1,310 long miles from Naples, FL where I had been living for just under a year, to Long Island, NY to see my grandma who was in the hospital with an abstract intention of returning to Florida.
When exactly? Who knew.
Since that 24 hour flurry of a drive I’ve spent time in the NYC area, Buffalo, Lake George, Toronto, Chicago, Santa Monica, Joshua Tree, Martha’s Vineyard and now I’m back in South Florida — this time though the circumstances are dramatically different.
I’ve attended and participated in festivals, workshops, trainings, retreats, plant medicine ceremonies, and sacred gatherings with kindred souls, most a result of spur of the moment decisions.
That hurried drive back to NY earlier this summer would begin what was and continues to be the greatest risk of this past year…
You see, no longer is there a ‘plan’ nor is there a concrete and definite definition to my life, at least for this moment. Instead there is creation — in the purest sense — like flowing red hot lava, screeching to a halt as it cools and forms into the black rock that life sprouts from.
A man who chose to risk the illusory sense of safety and security that a home, a job, geography, food, possessions, Whole Foods and even friends provide.
A man who chose to risk comfort to enter into the unfamiliar, uncomfortable and uncertain space of not knowing what’s next or where’s next.
A man who chose to risk everything to learn to live in the moment - not in theory, but in fucking reality.
Like mother Teresa greeting the suffering, I open my arms wide, daily, to receive this magical and mysterious experience called life — sometimes speechless and in awe as I simultaneous create and observe this amorphous thing that transcends words.
I’m here, but I’m not planted here — I’m a Native American, moving as the seasons of my soul change.
Here I am…exactly where I always AM, but where is here, is neither here nor there.
In a few weeks I’ll be in Costa Rica creating life with my soul tribe and then I’m heading back to Santa Monica to hang out with the best coaches in the world.
For now this is all I know or need to know and I’m cool with that.
As life has polished me into the pearl that I AM, I've been blessed to learn that the ‘details’ will come as I, like newly weds dancing to that first dance, tightly embrace Grace as if she is my life partner.
Life is happening abundantly, more is coming, more than I need to imagine right now.